Mean Machine
Inside for 3 years, outside for 90 minutes.
From the producer of Snatch comes this rousing, rough-and-tumble story that shows spirit and heart can exist in the most unlikely places... and in the most unlikely men.
Ex-soccer star Danny Meehan (Vinnie Jones) was sitting on top of the world... until a sports fixing scam ruined his career and an assault charge landed him jail. When the prison's soccer-crazed warden (David Hemmings) asks Danny to coach the guard's soccer team, Danny counters with another idea: a match between the guards and the convicts. For the inmates, it's the dream of a lifetime: a dirty no-holds barred chance to face the malicious guards. But first, Danny must turn a group of murderers, thieves and madmen into something unthinkable: a team. Based on the film classic The Longest Yard, Mean Machine scores with its lineup of gritty action, colorful characters and hilarious comedy.
Member Reviews
Mean Machine - APV55555
Mean Machine is the Soccer version of the “The Longest Yard”. Although the movie is predicable, this is a really funny and enjoyable movie. Vinnie Jones is a standout as Danny the former professional soccer player who is asked to put together a team to play against the guards.I love this movie - Rashan
This is by far one of my favourite movies. It has everything really except a leading lady I guess. Though one could argue the lady is the game of football (soccer)... while I'm on that thought, I'd say it's a in love, out of love, back in love story between Danny "Mean Machine" Mehan and the game of football.
Anyway, on a less abstract note... this movie is funny, brilliant, action packed and loaded with wonderfully colourfull characters. This is one of the few movies I can easily and gladly watch twice in the same day, and I have!!
Interestingly enough, I find the movie very similar to "Greenfinger". Which, actually stars many of the same actors and has pretty much the same story line. Except that ones about gardening and this ones about football. Not to make light of "Greenfinger", but I am a good deal more into football than gardening. Though I also enjoy Greenfinger and have watched it a number of times.
I'd recommend checking them both out.The Mean Machine Rides Again... - Bryson_McCarthy
I was shocked when I came across this title on here since I'm a huge fan of the original Longest Yard, and after already seeing Adam Sandler's remake of the movie, plus others which borrow the idea (Stallone's Lock Up), a British version seemed a strange idea. But I think that's the thing that made this movie so good and so unique. It's not so much a remake of The Longest Yard as much as it's a British version of a classic comedy.
Technically, this is still a football movie like the others, it's just a British football movie, meaning they're soccer players instead. I think that could be the reason a lot of people will shy away from this movie is the fact that soccer is viewed as a much less violent sport, but in reality, it's just as violent, it's just done in a different way. Football is in your face violence while soccer is skilled play with an underlying level of violence which is planned and executed at just the right time.
Vinnie Jones plays a perfect character in Danny Meehan, a disgraced soccer star not wanting to have to go back into the world that originally brought him down. He plays it very cool and collected, a much more sophisticated version of the original Paul Crew from the other movies. The entire cast is great and not your typical Hollywood stars. these are guys who fit the roles of cons and soccer players. And Jason Statham (The Transporter) as the psychotic Monk steals every scene he's in. Just the black and white flashes of what's actually going through the head of this psycho makes the movie.
The final game was truely made for soccer fans. Although it would bore a lot of people, not being as action packed as The Longest Yard was, it's soccer at it's best, with great spots of comedy and violence. Just the announcers for the jail radio play-by-play make the game exciting. American and European Football are two totally different games and if you have knowledge and respect for the European version, you will love this
Member Reviews
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Mean Machine - APV55555
Mean Machine is the Soccer version of the “The Longest Yard”. Although the movie is predicable, this is a really funny and enjoyable movie. Vinnie Jones is a standout as Danny the former professional soccer player who is asked to put together a team to play ...I love this movie - Rashan
This is by far one of my favourite movies. It has everything really except a leading lady I guess. Though one could argue the lady is the game of football (soccer)... while I'm on that thought, I'd say it's a in love, out of love, back in love story between ...The Mean Machine Rides Again... - Bryson_McCarthy
I was shocked when I came across this title on here since I'm a huge fan of the original Longest Yard, and after already seeing Adam Sandler's remake of the movie, plus others which borrow the idea (Stallone's Lock Up), a British version seemed a strange idea. ...